This post is written by a patient and sponsored by HCA HealthOne.
I am a mom. Words I wasn’t sure I would ever say after the words, “You have cancer,” were said to me.
2019 was poised to be the best year of my life. I was married in February. We were getting
ready to start the next part of our lives, together. That was the same year when I found a lump in my breast. I had been feeling some pain for a while and finally, when I got my diagnosis it was at stage III.
My team at HCA HealthONE Rose – a part of HCA Health ONE – was amazing. Even better than amazing, they understood me and fought for me. My breast surgeon, Dr. Kayla Griffith, turned to me and said, “You are 30 years old, you just got married. If you even think you want to have kids, just know that In vitro fertilization (IVF) is an option.” My husband and I had always talked about having a family, so we didn’t hesitate. We immediately went into IVF to harvest my eggs before I underwent surgery.
IVF is a procedure that helps people conceive by combining eggs and sperm outside of the
body. The process was a total whirlwind. We were able to harvest eggs and get eight healthy embryos. That gave us time to pause and put that aside knowing we had options. We looked at each other and said, “We will think about this later.” Because we knew we had work to do.
Then we dove headfirst into treatment. Dr. Griffith performed a bilateral mastectomy and then had to go back in for a second procedure because my care team didn’t like what they saw on my pathology. After recovering from those surgeries, I started a 16-week chemo schedule in January 2020. Then there was a reconstruction surgery and in June, I started radiation. After I completed 25 rounds of radiation, my treatment was complete.
It took about two years for me to feel like a human being again. Then it was time to ask my doctor, “What about pregnancy?”
I talked to all my doctors, they said they couldn’t tell me whether or not I could actually
become pregnant. They did say that after chemotherapy and treatment infertility can be as
high as 30 to 40 percent for women. The risk was if I got off the medication which in all
honesty, I needed, it could throw my body into a complete hormonal mix-up. We knew if we were going to have the kid we want, we want me to live throughout that kid’s life. What’s the point in risking my health just to carry the baby?
I can’t say enough about my care team. How would I have known what long-term effects my cancer treatment would have on my body? I wasn’t thinking about anything other than the words, “I have cancer.” Dr. Griffith saw me as a 30-year-old woman, with options. I felt that I was getting not just medical treatment, but human treatment. She never swayed from the belief that I was going to live a long life.
It was at that point we started looking into surrogacy. We had an agency that was recommended to us by our IVF doctor. We were comfortable being with this agency and we were all in.
Life is a funny thing. We had just signed on with the agency and had our neighbors over for an evening to catch up. Between our cancer journey, COVID and life, we hadn’t caught up in a while. When I got to the end of the story saying we had signed up for surrogacy, my neighbor, Katie, looked me right in the eye and said: “I have always wanted to be a surrogate.”
What? How does that even happen?
I thought, this isn’t real. I was just like, “Katie, you are sweet, but you don’t have to do that.” She said: “I’m serious. I wanted to do it for my sister who was unable to have children. I have thought about it so much over the years.”
There are legal, medical, financial and psychological implications so we went through the
agency, ensuring it was all square. Two years after that conversation, with the help of Katie, my husband and I welcomed our daughter, Annella.
So, now here I am. I have been cancer-free for five years and I am a mother. It’s been the best gift to see all of these firsts through my daughters’ eyes. Annella has seen her first snow, her first Halloween and we’re getting ready for her first holiday season. I am so excited to look at the world through her eyes. Had Dr. Griffith not discussed my fertility and opened the door for IVF, my world would be very different. I couldn’t be more thankful.
When you need compassionate cancer care, HCA HealthONE is the ONE here for you. HCA HealthONE’s breast cancer programs offer comprehensive services with a compassionate approach. We treat your cancer and care for your emotional well-being. Starting with diagnosis and treatment, our relationship with you continues through rehabilitation and survivorship. Learn more here.
